As more & more of my friends try to be like Theresa and I, I want to welcome Ben Grogan back to Los Angeles. He is not only copying me by working at my company and sitting at the desk next to me, but also living in our condo building renting from our landlord. In addition, Ben & his lovely wife Maria (a sarcastic, loving, evil woman much like….oh….say…..my wife) have a young baby boy who is huge and all too anxious to grow up much like JJ.

In addition, congrats to Deb & Glenn on their big announcement as they try to be more like us with Deb’s pregnancy. I have already made it clear to Deb that if they have a girl, I will forbid JJ from marrying her as I continue to protect the ancient secret Schlossberg fortune of jewels, gold and cursed Aztec treasures. Yes - yes - my parents deny its existance but I know it is real and soon it shall be mine……all mine…….

Congratulations to Mitch & Kim on the birth of their new daughter, Samantha Skye Rily.

…to see the Stanley Cup. I’m jealous, but my son is definitely cooler.

Congratulations to Ben & Maria who are now 12 weeks along in their pregnancy. I should also mention three of my cousins are very close to coming to term with their pregnancies and my coworker Niels & his wife Jo are also pregnant with their first child.

It should be noted that everyone else got their wives pregnant after I got Theresa pregnant…so in essence they are all just copying me like Mitch.

PS - forgot to mention my old college roommate Matt - formerly of New Orleans now of Ohio - and his wife are expecting a new daughter any day now as well.

In his continuing efforts to emulate my life, Mitch announced on his birthday that he & Kim are now expecting a child. Big congrats to you and Kim both, buddy. You two have no idea what you’re in for. (I mean that in a good way.)

This evening, recollecting that Matt Von Stetina, my college roommate from my freshman & sophomore year at Syracuse, lived in New Orleans, I decided to throw his name into Google & see what came of it.

The last time I talked to Matt I remembered he had gotten married, had a daughter and was working as a driving graveyard tour guide in the Big Easy. The first link that came up with his name was the website of the company he worked at doing those tours. His bio & pic are about 2/3 down the page.

The second site that came up was rather disturbing. About 1/3 down is the following:

“Sidney Smith, Matthew Von Stetina, his wife Bridget and 2 small children along with Adele Bertucci and her mother are trapped on the roof at 97 Fontainebleau Dr. water and food supplies have run out. A nearby rooftop is on fire. Boats and helicopters have passed them by! Dead bodies of neighbors are floating around. PLEASE HELP!!!!”

Some of you who read this are college friends and probably remember him. I have emailed the webmaster of the graveyard tour company to see if they have any further news of Matt’s predicament. Should I learn anything further, I will let you all know.

———

Fast Followup:

The webmaster of the company he worked at contacted me. He & his family were rescued.

to wish my wife a HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

Happy birthday, Theresa!

In the unusual circumstances that I should be found dead in a ditch or something like that tomorrow morning, I would just like everyone to know it is probably because Ace killed me because I told him the following before the Red Sox / Yankees series began:

Me: sox are gonna lose
Ace: my luck they will lose the game i go to
Me: I am predicting a grand slam by the yankees in the 9th inning of the 7th game [to win the series]

Saw “The Village” Friday night. Originally it was just going to be Theresa and I, but about 10 mins before the movie started, Kathy & Rachel walked in & sat down by us.

Overall, it was an entertaining film - good acting, nice plot & strong characters. It’s not as good as “The Sixth Sense”, but definitely better than Shayamalan’s other two films, although “Signs” is a great film until the final 15-20 minutes when they come out of the basement.

During the credits roll, I commented to the others “It would have been a much better film if the creatures had actually been aliens….aliens who can be killed with water.” To which Kathy quickly added, “And everyone were already dead, but they just didn’t know it.” That gave us all a good laugh. I think it upset a few of the people around us though because I did see a few nasty glances directed in our way….althought that could just as easily have been because I was throwing popcorn at people whom I felt were unworthy to be in the same theater as me during the film.

James’s new blog entry is uninspired & boring.